Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Thinking Tall

It all started on Easter, when my 13-year-old cousin, Max, showed up showing off his newly long, gangly, teenage legs.

He's taller than me.

I was not happy.

But I knew that I wasn't the only one Max had surpassed; if he was taller than me, he was taller than my cousins Liz and Danielle.

Or so I thought.

I was reading through Liz's Match profile last weekend and my eyes stop on her height.

"You're not 5'6", girl! Why are you lying about your height? Only guys lie about their height!"

She insisted that she actually is 5'6" and I insisted that she was the same height as me, 5'2". We've been living together for a year and a half and also we've been cousins for 30 years so obviously I would know! I forced her to stand up and we looked in the mirror and maybe there was an optical illusion but she looked...about four inches taller than me.

So that was pretty disappointing.

Also Liz laughed at me and then texted Meg so that Meg could laugh at me, too. Rude.

But I still had Danielle in the short cousin club (my sister and our other cousin Paige are both around 5'8") and I appreciated that I wasn't the only short one. At least I had that.

And then Sunday rolled around and Liz invited Danielle over for dinner. We were eating when suddenly I burst out with "Dani, how tall are you?"

She looked at me suspiciously. Liz laughed. She answered. About 5'6".

I was sad about my new found shortness, but I was not broken. I still had my pride. I know that I am not tall, but I will insist that I am not short.

Later on Sunday night, I happened to see a picture of my old boss with Carrie Underwood. (Thanks, social media, for the photographic randomness.)

I see the picture and I am struck by -- what else? -- how little she looked. How absolutely miniature! How terribly, terribly tiny! How remarkably short, despite the heels she was wearing!

I don't know what possessed me to do it, but I consulted my friend Google for Carrie Underwood's height.

And she's taller than me.

Damnit. 

3 comments:

Accidentally Me said...

Well I have great news...you are still taller than me!!!

p2 said...

I don't understand the comments of Anonymous. It's apparent that our beloved blogger may be average in stature but big in heart. I don't think the post really discussed the details of selling a car or imported media. You do have a point, women that live in the upper class love to wear fashionable clothes, and A is one high class lady.

A said...

hahahaha p2. I've been having THE WORST problem with spam comments lately. So annoying.

AM: one of the many reasons I love you is because I am taller than you and I'm not evening imagining it.

 
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