Monday, February 18, 2013

Mostly Better

I am less of a lunatic today.

Finally letting myself cry helped. Even though it was a big, ugly cry on my way to my hockey game. I showed up with mascara smeared all over my splotchy cheeks. My teammates were kind enough to pretend not to notice. I paid them back by letting the other team score the winning goal with five seconds left in the game. Sorry, team.

I am less anxious today. I feel gloomy but I don't feel like I am about to combust.

My problem is not from a single source. Everything is bugging me right now. Everything feels impossible.

It's going to take a while for me to chip away at this. So that's what I'm going to do. Start chipping away the pieces. See how much progress I make. See how it goes for a little while before I determine if it would make more sense to get a little help.

If I can make it through the end of March, I'll be okay. To me, the end of March signals the end of winter. The end of winter signals a fresh start.

A fresh start is precisely what I am craving.


Anonymous said...

Hang in there, girl! Spring is right around the corner!

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