Friday, November 23, 2012

Just Mad

I sacrificed my entire day to being angry with Emma. And sad about Emma. And eating leftovers.

I expertly spaced out the leftovers throughout the day. I had a dish every 90 minutes. Stuffing followed by sweet potatoes followed by turkey followed by cranberries followed by mashed potatoes followed by pecan pie. I highly recommend this method.

The rest of the day, I tiptoes around the house and tried to be there for my mom in the least invasive way possible. I helped her with a few things, watched a few wedding shows on television, read and endlessly scrolled through Pinterest.

Endless scrolling through Pinterest is an excellent coping mechanism when you're feeling heartsick.

My cousin Anna (Emma's older sister) called at one point. Crying, scared, upset. She thinks Emma needs to be hospitalized. My mom thinks Emma needs to be hospitalized. I assume that it is just a matter of time. She is rapidly heading towards hitting rock bottom.

Nothing can ever be calm and normal and okay.

I just want quiet. Can't we ever have quiet?


Kar said...

Mental Illness is so tough to deal with. Emma is truly lucky to have your family behind her. Remember to take care of yourself and not to take what she does personally.

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