Tuesday, May 22, 2012

30 weeks of awkwardness

Alexander is back.

Sort of. I haven’t seen him. I’ve heard from him.

He does this thing where he drops off of my radar and, without warning, he pops back up again. Generally within a few hours of any picture of me being posted on Facebook. Like he forgets how adorable and fun I am until an image of me flashes across his screen and oh! Must. Text. Aly.

I would rather not hear from him.

I feel awful admitting that.

And then I think about all of the dudes who never worked out and who have seen a text message from me on their phone and winced just like I’m wincing when Alexander reaches out to me and then I feel both awful and pathetic.

It was easier, before, when things with The Coach were a little less steady. My feet are under me now and I am not so anxious (that’s not to say that I’ve had The Talk with him because, alas, I have not and, yes, I do deserve to be smacked) and I am not quite so unsure.

Alexander is just so bold. Maybe that’s just because he is young. Less jaded than The Coach or me. He just puts it out there. Exactly what he’s thinking. Exactly what he wants. Or what he thinks that he should be thinking. Or what he thinks that what he wants. I haven’t quite figured that much out yet – if he’s genuine or if he’s manipulative or if this is just a fun game to engage in.

I don’t intend to figure it out. Whatever he’s doing and whatever reason he’s doing it. I don’t want to know.

And I have to figure out a nice way to tell him as much.

Because hockey season is 30 weeks long. 30 weeks of awkwardness is 30 weeks too many.


k said...

You could have the talk with The Coach and then you'll be able to tell Alexander that, sorry you have a boyfriend... :)

Kari said...

I love K's idea!

A said...

Wait, what?! You girls are CRAZY!

Just kidding. Getting to it, I swear. There have been a few minor complications. The plan is always evolving I'm trying to hit a moving target.

(Yes: excuses, excuses.)

Teagan B. Sawyer said...

Loved your come back to his line!

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