Saturday, October 01, 2011

Yes, I've lost it

I turn 29 tomorrow.

This is shocking.

29.

29 as in almost 30 as in EVERY NEWS SHOW I WATCHED THIS WEEK WAS ABOUT HOW MY EGGS ARE GOING BAD.

Seriously, you guys. I watched Maria Menounos talk about how she’s freezing her eggs because she’s 33 and I guess that’s old but not too old to drop $10,000 on the harvesting/freezing process and she’ll magically get pregnant when she feels like getting pregnant. (I’m sure that’s, like, fail proof.) (And why does she need to discuss this on television?) And then some other crap on the rapid deterioration of the eggs that Maria says I should be harvesting.

Also I swear all of my friends are pregnant. Which is of course not true but LUCY IS and Lucy is Lucy and my sun practically revolves around our friendship so naturally it feels like everybody is pregnant. When in reality it is just her and Heather. And this girl who I played soccer with. And this one girl who I kind of know from work. Plus yesterday I saw Liz’s friend’s Sumo baby and she is so cute and so chubby that I almost stole her.

Why, yes, this is panic mode. Thank you for noticing.

When you turn 29 as in almost 30 you have to evaluate your life and your timelines and what is realistic WHEN YOU ARE SITTING AROUND WITH YOUR EGGS GOING BAD and also, hi, I have such awesome luck with finding boyfriends, let alone husbands, let alone baby daddies. This won’t be an issue at all!

I turn 29 tomorrow and this is what I conclude happens when you turn 29. You freak out. About eggs and babies. And then you take your birth control pill at exactly 9:15.

(This is the part where I acknowledge that I am obviously a little bit insane. And clearly a little self-centered. But have nothing but respect for: parents, those who want to be parents, those who never want to be parents, those trying to conceive, those unable to conceive, those working so, so hard to conceive and anyone who has ever been a baby. I’m not trying to be disrespectful of anyone else's situation. I am just feeling old in my ovaries.)

3 comments:

Kari said...

Happy Birthday to you!!! Hope you have a wonderful day. 29 will be good to you! Enjoy your birthday!

k said...

i read about maria menounos, it just seemed a bit over the top and i felt like the story was going to make women around her age all paranoid about their eggs needlessly. my friend casually mentioned it to me a bit ago. i basically brushed it off, but deep down i thought it was really an insensitive comment. i mean, first off it is extremely expensive, like $20,000 - I don't make that much in a year (which she knows, she is a grad student too). And it is very time consuming an painful! My friend did it this spring bc she has cancer and is undergoing chemo and she said that she questioned whether it was worth it several times during the process. I guess it is just something that I try not to think about. While I love children, I think I could have a full and satisfying life without them. I just trust that whatever happens will end up being the best for me.

Mrs. Architect said...

k wrote a comment to perfect for me to add anything else. :)

 
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