Wednesday, August 03, 2011

I like, but do not need, safe

8:30 am. Wednesday. I am at yoga class because I don’t really feel like running, because I have credits on my account to use, because I have tension for prayer twist to wring out of my back.

I am taking a slow flow class.

I almost always take slow flow classes. I beat myself up enough running and playing soccer. Slow flow yoga gives me what I need, which isn’t so much to feel like I just had an intense workout but more to feel like I’m back to my baseline normal. Where my tight shoulders aren’t creeping up around my ears and my hip flexors aren’t screaming at me.

It’s just personal preference. That's what I tell myself.

I hate to admit it – but it is also a touch of laziness. Because I don’t have to work as hard. And I don’t have to pay such close attention. Because I will never be the weakest or the most inexperienced in the class. Because it is safe and I like safe.

At 8:32, I realize that my slow flow class is not a slow flow class. It is a standard vinyasa class. And there is no escaping. (Believe me, I considered it.)

But maybe I could feign an injury? (This was also strongly, but briefly, considered.)

Or I could take to heart what every yoga instructor I’ve ever had has repeated over and over and over again: do my best, make modifications when necessary, listen to my body.

And check my damn ego at the door.

Which is what I did. And what I should have done. Because the only intimidating part of the class was the label that the instructor slapped on it.

It was a good reminder of how often I hide behind what is safe and how easily I am scared away by the idea of something before I ever truly give it a chance. It was a good lesson to learn. And it was a good class.

I think I’ll go again next Wednesday.


Kim said...

The instructor makes all the difference in yoga. In my limited (but fun) yoga experiences, the instructor can make or break the entire experience.

Teagan B. Sawyer said...

You are so super strong girlie! Good for you for figuring that all out. You totally inspire me.

Kari said...

Yeah! See you are stepping out of your comfort about next you tell the coach how you feel about him leaving :)
I agree about the instructor. I love the one we have for our summer session (we have yoga Wednesdays at work during lunch)...she makes the hour fly by...some of the other instructors have made the hour drag.
Hope the wedding week isn't too hellish...

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