Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Press releases and other insanity

Something that I learned yesterday: it is one thing to know that something is happening, but it is quite another to read about it. Last night featured a Twitter announcement (which made me cry) and a press release (which made me cry) and the recurrence of the overwhelming sadness that had finally started to die down.

This morning, the team posted the press release on their F'book account. The press release had a headshot of The Coach as press releases often do and, this is not a lie, out of the first 5 comments, 3 of them read as follows:
a. Handsome
b. LOL! I was gonna say "Hottie!" but didnt know what the "serious fans" would think. :)
c. Cute and qualified!

Bitches best keep their distance or I’m going to show them what girls from Detroit are made of.

Except that I’m actually from the suburbs and those jersey chasing whores probably wouldn’t be intimidated by an angsty poem and a pile of tissues.

* * *

Can we pause for a moment and reflect on how weird/hilarious it is that I am with a guy who gets press releases written about him? And there are people who care enough to comment on the press releases? This is bizarre to me. Does the universe not know that I am a plain and lowly librarian?

* * *

We haven’t had a good talk since this all blew up. I absolutely understand why – he is getting pulled in a lot of different directions, he’s getting dozens and dozens of congratulatory phone calls and text messages and emails and he’s 8 hours away coaching at an elite camp for elite kids. I’m giving him space and not pushing for any deep chats or significant decisions or anything because I’d rather do it in person when he gets back at the end of the weekend, anyway. And because I’m not ready. And because I’m scared and overwhelmed and exhausted and I can’t eat and don’t know what I even want to say.

* * *

“You’re going to come and visit me, right?” he asked me on Sunday night, when all of this was still hypothetical.
“I’ll come and visit you if you want me to come and visit you,” I told him. “Did you want me to come and visit?”
He answered in the affirmative. January, he suggested. “It will be in the 80s,” he said as though he wasn’t reason enough.

* * *

Maybe this is na├»ve, but however we decide to leave our relationship (I’m putting my money on it staying exactly as it is: casual and free to see other people) at the time that The Coach leaves, I expect that I will hear from him.

Do you guys remember when he first started chasing after me? It was December 26. I was skipping my high school reunion and going downtown to see a musical with my mom and my sister. I didn’t have his number in my phone and I had no idea who had texted me. Entirely out of the blue, it was The Coach.

I haven’t stopped hearing from him since.

Not when he was on campus. (Tell me he couldn’t find other girls to occupy his time on a college campus.) Not when he was on road trips. Not when he came home for the summer.

He’s not one for disappearing entirely. Not historically.

My friend Ashley – who knows The Coach – always insists that he doesn’t have the game that everyone assumes (based on his looks) that he has, and that he isn’t the guy who brings home random girls and he’s not the consummate man whore and he isn’t as confident as he appears and he tends to favor the familiar. Which is why he was in that toxic relationship for so long. Which was why he had the courage to go after me in the first place: he already knew me.

And that is why I’m not expecting him to move, meet a new girl within the first four days and completely disappear. So, if that’s not setting myself up to be disappointed I don’t know what is.


Kari said...

I would agree with Ashley -- I know many boys like the Coach (my hometown was filled with them as we were a hockey town). Everyone who didn't really know them thought they were players because well, that's what they were expected to be...when really they weren't.
Wish there was something I could do to make you feel better...

Teagan B. Sawyer said...

Wow...just wow...reading all of that and you are so good and selfless about it all. I totally get the whole thinking about things in the way that you do. I have so much hope for you and him...well really more for you for everything to work out in your favor. Whatever that may be.

Laurie said...

Did I miss something? Has the coach broken up with his longtime girlfriend? I ask because of this statement "Which is why he was in that toxic relationship for so long."

doahleigh said...

I know he's moving, but he seems pretty into you. Just saying.

A said...

Laurie - you didn't miss anything. I just failed to make their relationshiph status clear!

They're not together. They haven't been, actually, since him and I have been. The nature of their relationship was always so off and on that, for a long time, I still felt like the other woman and was sort of always looking over my shoulder, waiting for her to come back into the picture. But I know with a fair amount of certainty that they are no longer communicating at all, so I'm not so worked up about it. Also I'm super busy being worked up about his impending move. haha.

Accidentally Me said...

Oh my, he IS adorable!!! And he sorta looks like Jason Bateman, too:-)

You have to talk to him before he leaves, but not necessarily now. He will probably come looking for you when he gets back...and will likely want to relax and get away from the hubbub (which I am sure you can help with!)

So, that is probably just the time to enjoy being around him. Then in a week or two you can worry about framing your relationship going forward.

aahager said...

What school is he going to coach for? Would love to see what he looks like!

A said...

I so want to post a link to his presser and 92 pictures of his cute face, but I probably shouldn't. (Someone please congratulate me on my rare display of self control!)

Pictures and coaching details are quite certainly available via email. Shoot me a line!

Anonymous said...

I found him pretty easily through Google with some deductive reasoning. Jason Bateman is a good description, he does look older than I imagined though. Probably just the pic that they chose.

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