Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Residing at different ends of the spectrum

Answer this for me, friends: is it at all possible to be involved with someone who has completely different political ideals than you do?

Because there’s this boy who I know from soccer who is clearly harboring a great, intense, secret and passionate love for me (just a crush? Please. Like it is possible to only have a mere crush on me.). And he is, like, SuperConservative and I am so not.

Disclaimer: I have absolutely no problem with my friends and my family members who have different beliefs than I do. We coexist by agreeing to disagree, with a bit of healthy dialogue sprinkled in sporadically. I’m not completely intolerant or anything of the sort. I’m just a little hesitant to even give this guy a shot when – oh, I don’t know. ...when I know that he’s so outspoken about his political leanings, I guess.

So, I’m pretty liberal and he’s really conservative and, probably more significantly, he’s really involved in a lot of conservative/Republican organizations and he obviously strongly believes in what he chooses to believe. I totally respect that. I probably don’t agree with a lot of it. But I respect it.

Really, I do. If you care enough about an issue to put your time/effort/energy towards it, I think that is awesome. Even if I don’t think that the cause itself is awesome. Believing in something is awesome. Working towards what you feel will make your city/your state/your country better is a good thing.

But I have my doubts about how such a thing ever work out in the long run. Is it even possible? Should I even try?

I keep telling myself to give him a chance. But then he’ll post something on his Facebook that reads something along the lines of “conservativeconservativeconservativewhinyliberalsconservative, woo!” and then I cringe. And then I doubt myself. And then I chastise myself for having such a narrow mind.


Mrs. Architect said...

Hmmm...that's tough. Religion, politics, money and sex...all things that I imagine would be really tough in a relationship if you don't see eye to eye.

Impossible? Definitely not. But tough for sure. I don't know sweetie - follow your heart!

Kari said...

yes it is possible...
I dated for many years a guy who was a seperatist (I am a federalist). I was very involved in politics at the time and worked very hard on the anti-seperation campaign. He too was active in politics and the seperation campaign. The political differences had nothing to do with our breaking up (him wanting to get married and have babies when we were 22 was the reason!).

Also most of my best friends are very conservative (I met them in Grad school in the US)...I am not politically conservative. What I have learned is that the spectrum is not linear -- it is actual a circle. At the end of the two spectrums there are actually many views that are similar.

While you may differ politically, you may be similar in many other ways.

I say give it a shot!

my life is brilliant said...

I agree with Kari. As long as you are both open minded and can appreciate that not all your beliefs will line up (which would be the case no matter what), you'll be just fine.

Paul Michael Peters said...

There is a couple in my family who have been married since the 1950's who are about as divided as you can be politically. But they are still very in love and part of their passion comes from disagreement.

Reasonable people can get along. If he is reasonable (which I suspect a good conservative like myself will be) you should be fine. Political divides are more media driven than anything. Do you really think anyone wants a bad economy? Bring death and plague? I honestly believe that people from all parties want Americans to do well, live in freedom, and be good to one another. If they want death and destruction they are not going to be very reasonable and not someone you would want to be with.

Thisisme said...

It's def possible!! My adopted parents have been married for 30 years! They taught us all to be very politically opinionated as well even though they're complete opposites. . .they just agreed to disagree! They always jokingly try to trick eachother not to vote on voting day by telling the other one not go vote b/c it'll just cancel the other one's out. I think it's an admirable attribute to argue your opinion safely without harming a relationship!!

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