Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Can't do anything but hope for the best

It is a big day for me.

I have a progress review with my new boss. We haven’t set my goals for 2008 (What? It’s only mid-April.), so I guess we’re going to sit down and hammer that mess out. I don’t really know why we bother with setting goals, pretending like my job is something that a trained monkey couldn’t do. I wonder what he would say to the suggestion that my annual goals include “being the best lackey-with-an-$80,000+-education I can be.”

More importantly, I sort of, kind of, absolutely must tell my boss that I’m going to take a few classes this summer. I’m taking a Tuesday and a Wednesday class, both at my school’s main campus, not the oh-so-convenient satellite campus that is 12 minutes from the office. I’ll have to leave work 15 or 20 minutes early those days. If he doesn’t give me his blessing...I am fucked. I don’t know what I will do. Quit my job? Not really an option. Take online classes? I don’t know if any classes are even open at this point. Take the semester off? I don’t want to extend this educational journey any longer.

If he says no to me, I guarantee that I will cry. Probably not in front of him. But once I get back to my desk and start thinking about it? Hell yes. Bawling. All red and splotchy with snot running down my face. Going to school means a lot to me right now – and, amazingly, you can see it in my grades – and I don’t know what I will do if that is taken away from me. School, and that promise of the future: it is exactly what is keeping me going.

I have to sell this. I am going to tell him that I am taking a few classes, prerequisites that I didn’t take as an undergrad, so that I can apply for business school. I will tell him that it will take me forever to finish (to alleviate any concerns or fears that I will be leaving soon). If asked, I will tell him why I am going back to school: because I am educated and smart and I am still a glorified secretary. Because I have been working for this company for more than three years and haven’t gotten a raise (okay, technically I did get one, but it was so small that it doesn’t cover the increase in cost of living). I’ll be honest, but not too honest. I am not going to library school. I am not graduating in a year.

So nervous.

Wish me luck.

Updated: I asked him, in a shockingly calm manner. His response? "That shouldn't be a problem." It was hardly a big deal.


Accidentally Me said...

I like the approach...bosses should ALWAYS be supportive of education and training. And if he isn't, well then you should seriously consider finding a new boss.

Stace said...

15-20 minutes should be NOTHING, I mean you could come in early if he needed you there a full 8 hours. But hopefully it will go smoothly enough for you. :)

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