Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Settling in

I still don’t have internet access or cable television at my apartment (the appointment is tomorrow – finally). Other than that severe inconvenience, and the fact that I haven’t moved even half of my clothes, I’m starting to feel at home.

My initial misgivings were mostly ridiculous, fueled by a bad cold and a case of Too Much New at One Time. I was overwhelmed.

This living situation will be good. It is almost like living at home – as Anna and I rarely cross paths. I work 8:30 am – 5:00 pm. I get up at 6:45 am and am usually in bed by 11:00 pm. She works 3:00 pm – 11:00 pm. She wakes up around 9:00 or 10:00 am and goes to bed around 1:00 or 2:00 am. Other than on her days off (and she works every-other weekend), we’re not going to see much of each other. I don’t think it is a bad thing.

I’m working on getting into my class schedule. I am anticipating this semester to be challenging; I spent all of last night doing the reading and assignments for one of my classes, only to realize that I am completely lost. Already. After one class. Great.

My other class doesn’t seem like it will be too crazy hard, but it appears that I’ll have my fair share of work to do. Busywork, that is. Work that requires time that I do not necessarily have. But will find, I suppose. I don’t see that I have any other choice.

I haven’t quite found my exercise routine. I’m going to try to get to yoga at 6:30 am on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Starting tomorrow, if all goes well.

And I’m starting to figure out how to live my life without Colin. I don’t check my phone in the morning to see if any text messages came from him while I was sleeping. When emails pop into my inbox during the day, I do not even entertain the consideration that they are from him. I know that he won’t call. And I am trying to create my own sense of closure, since he has not been decent enough to give even that to me.

Just trying to get it all done. To fit in. To be happy. To maintain my composure. And to keep blogging about it.


DShan said...

just keep bloggin it. it'll all settle into a life you can't picture right now, and in ways it'll be better. focus on those little things that are better than what you remember with colin, and you'll get through to the next thing.

DShan said...
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OC said...

Good luck. Closure is hard to come by and if you can do it without him being a part of it, you're a stronger woman than I.

Blogging is an amazing outlet, don't get me wrong, but there is something satisfying about putting what you want to say out there. Or whatever it takes for you to actually have closure.

Stace said...

He's a jerk! I can't believe he's not even going to let you know what's going on. BLAH! You're better than all of that, not to mention to busy to even think of him which is good. I talk the talk but haven't quite walk the walk. But keep it up I say one day at a time we should be fine. :D

Anonymous said...

here's to settling in! i hope your new roomy continues to work out perfectly. as for school, you're a super smart girl, you'll catch up asap!!! we know you can do it!

Accidentally Me said...

Glad to hear that you are feeling better:-) Change can be tough to digest sometimes!

I still think this is the strangest break-up I have ever heard, he just basically stopped talking to you?

Just be prepared to tell him to fuck off when he comes back with his sob story about how tough his own life is and why he should be forgiven for ignoring you for a month. Because he will try at some point.

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