Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The curse of the optimist

I just sent my résumé in for a job that I really want. I’d say this happens about twice per month: I find a job that I fall in love with, I apply, I spend 10-14 days obsessing about what my new life will be like once I land the job and then I never hear from the company.

It’s great. Really effective at developing thick skin, too.

I try not to get too worked up about it.

Last night, I drove back to my side of town (translation: away from the shithole location where I currently live) to substitute for a soccer team that was short a few girls. After the game and a speedy shower, Colin took me to see Spiderman 3.

That, children, is one looooooooooooooooooong film.

Especially when you go to a 10:15 pm show. On a work night. Three days after you quit coffee.

Not the best choice I’ve ever made, but it was a rare treat to see Colin on a weeknight.

I still haven’t made a decision about that soccer team I was invited to play on. I am ridiculously conflicted about it. Today, I will play because my Sunday team has too many girls on the roster and I won’t play as much as I’d like. Sunday, I didn’t want to play because I’m not comfortable being in the lower half of the team’s players. Yesterday, I decided to play because I like a bit of challenge and adversity to overcome. Saturday, I would not join the team because I should be sacrificing a bit of my recreation and dedicate more of my free time to finding a new job.

This is about a soccer team. When faced with a real decision, I am positively screwed.

I’m excited about the long Memorial Day weekend. I have no plans and I have to work on Saturday. But that hasn’t kept me from dreaming. In my head, I have a hearty list of restaurants I’d like to visit and activities I’d like to busy myself with. I’ll probably spend the majority of the weekend reading a book in the sun on Mom and Dad’s deck. And that’d be fine with me.

Here’s what isn’t fine with me: how slowly this workday is going.

I could really go for a cup of coffee.


Amy said...

I can completely relate to that job scenario. I do the same exact cycle. Although now, there is a bit of cynicism in my heart. Like I just doubt that it will actually really happen EVER.

Enjoy the looooong weekend - a book on a deck with fam around sounds perfect!

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