Monday, September 04, 2006


What a way to start the day!
I kicked off the Labor Day/wedding weekend with an 8:00 am dentist appointment to have a filling replaced. Super awesome! This visit results in two realizations:
1. I’m not crazy about my dentist’s cocky, young new associate who might as well have jumped on my reclined body and danced around while singing about how she was the shit.
2. The topical numbing agent they used didn’t bother me in the slightest and – better yet – repressed my appetite until 1 pm. I may look into purchasing some on the black market for use on fat days when my appetite cannot be controlled.

De-uglifying the tootsies
After the dentist, I checked for unsightly cheek saggage or drooling and, convinced I looked suitable for a public appearance, I treated myself for a manicure and a pedicure. Which, per usual, I fucking loved.

Note to self: invest in rich husband to bankroll weekly mani/pedi.

Hitting the road
Lucy’s wedding was held in a quaint vacation town on the edge of Lake Huron, about three hours from where I live. The drive is a thrilling adventure for the eye, featuring farmland, gas stations, farmland, gas station/Subway/Beef Jerky Outlet supercenters and farmland.

My savior came an hour into the trip, in the form of my favorite outlet mall ever: Birch Run. I was responsible enough to limit myself to one store to "stretch my legs" (read: fuss over cute purses) and that one store was the Coach outlet.

I didn’t even buy anything. Very responsible, if you ask me.

More driving
More boring.

I check into my hotel as soon as I get into town. Mostly, it’s as glorious and as classy as I suspected. Except it was cleaner. (Hurrah.) The man working the front desk was creepy and was clearly suffering from some sort of a seasonal allergy problem.

I called Lucy once I was in settled in my hotel room. She and her fiancé were just finishing up lunch and were headed over to the beach where the wedding would be held. We decided that they would pick me up on the way.

Mr. Lucy
I should probably tell you all about Lucy’s fiancĂ©. His name is Chet. Well, his name isn’t really Chet, it’s something Hebrew but, when he moved to America from Israel three years ago, he decided to give himself an American name. And that name was Chet.

The wedding was held at the vacation home that Lucy’s aunt and uncle own. It’s right on the shore of Lake Huron. The backyard is an enormous expanse of white, clean sand. It’s absolutely picturesque, in a simple and beautiful way. Very Lucy.

When we got there, the tent (1,600 square feet) and the dance floor were being installed. Wanting to get something accomplished while staying out of the way of the party supply company, Lucy, Chet, Lucy’s mom and I carried the huppah out to the beach.

Lucy’s family and Chet made the huppah out of birch. It was absolutely perfect for the setting of the wedding.

We couldn’t get it sitting quite right.

And there was the whole issue of the sand and the wind and securing the structure.

Hilarity ensued.

I’m glad no one captured that moment on tape.

Second time’s the charm!
After the securing of the huppah and various other wedding-related tasks, we did what any normal person would do after wasting $20 on a failed Mystic Tan: we went to get another one.

Get this. It worked. Really well. Despite my hands and my feet looking ever-so-slightly funky (a small problem that cleared itself up by the wedding), I was very pleased.

Go figure!

Etc., etc., etc.
We went over to Lucy’s mom and dad’s house that night, but I’m not exactly sure why. To drop off the blueberry muffins and the cookies, maybe? That sounds right. We hung around there for a bit, playing with Lucy’s nephews, and then we dropped Chet off to visit his family at their hotel (his mom and sister flew in from Israel for the occasion) and then went off in search of "dinner."

We ended up at a bar. And neither of us were particularly hungry, so we split orders of deep-fried cauliflower and mushrooms and each had a drink. Not too exciting, but it was good to have time to catch up.

Absolutely exhausted, I finally got to bed around midnight. It was one of those hard, deep sleeps where you don’t move once during the night. I totally needed it.

Looking at all of that farmland takes a lot out of a girl!


M said...

wow what a post! sounds like a blast. thanks for the advice on mystic tan, i am trying to talk myself into it.

Blog Template by Delicious Design Studio