Saturday, October 15, 2005

Shower scandal

I don’t think I ever got into the gory details, so just trust me when I say that the shower we threw for my cousin Liz was:
a. gorgeous
b. over-the-top
c. a hell of a lot nicer than most weddings
d. huge
e. fucking expensive

My mom and aunts dumped a huge amount of cash (as well as time, energy and love) on the bridal bonanza. If a wedding shower can be off the hook (and the verdict is out on that), Liz’s shower was off the hook.

At the MegaShower, which from now on will be referred to as The Downpour, Liz got a ginormous amount of gifts. A little bit of everything off of her registry. Some random shit that people just bought for her. Trinkets and mementos up the ass. The typical, you know?

My dad’s cousin, Pat, bought Liz a wind chime.

When she got home, she noticed the remnants of a very familiar red clearance sticker.

Definitely from the very big retailer that she works for.

And, as Liz is nosey, oh-so-slightly materialistic and happens to make a living supervising the marking down of clearance items at her place of employment, she really couldn’t help but investigate the investment Pat made on her shower gift.

$3.48.

Moral: if you plan to spend less than $5 on a gift at a shower where the hostesses paid more than $20/head, buy the present at a retail chain other than the one the bride is employed at.

2 comments:

Plantation said...

A wind-chime? Are you fking kidding me? I don't care if the thing cost $200. A wind-chime? Sounds like a bad secret-Santa gift.

Unknown said...

And definitely don't leave the sticker on!!!

 
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