Friday, May 27, 2005

My aunt is Bette Midler

My aunt Lynn called me last night, crying.

Crying frigging tears of joy, for God’s sake.

Little Paulie passed his paper.
Little Paulie passed his English class.
Little Paulie is graduating.

And, according to Aunt Lynn, it was all because of me.

And I had thought that all I’d done was write a lousy English paper! Ha! My influence cannot be minimized in such a fashion! I do not give myself enough credit! I did not write a paper; I inspired! I pushed Paul into the arms of greatness!

Paul passed his math exam because of me.
Paul passed his English exam because of me.
Paul passed his government exam because of me.
Paul passed his marketing exam because of me.
Paul passed his physics exam because of me.

[That clever little jock passed physical education on his own.]

I was the wind beneath his wings.

And I was the safety net beneath Aunt Lynn’s optimistic decision to mail out Paul’s graduation announcements.

Oh. And speaking of Paul’s graduation announcements. We’re having a party for him.

I was thinking you might want to make some desserts for the party.

Wouldn’t that be fun?


ropedncr said...

the last time i was the wind beneath someone's wings, they had to leave the room.

you inspire us all to greatness (okay. well at least to upper-mediocrity).

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