Sunday, April 17, 2005

City folk

The town that I grew up in, which is also the town that I currently live in, is complete white trash.

Fortunately, I am a third-generation resident of this fine area, so not only am I residing in Redneck, USA, but I am also the proud owner of one of the better-known surnames around.

[“Is your dad Robbie? Me and Robbie, we stole beer off of the back of a truck in 1968! ...and now I’m your assistant principal. What a trip!”]

On my way to the mall today, I witnessed the fine sight that was a 300+ lb. man, in a kilt, carrying bagpipes, standing by the side of the road.

The Fat Bastard spotting occurred no less than four minutes after I stared, horrified, as a man did pushups in the parking lot of 7-Eleven while his young son watched.

I think we’ll stop this family legacy at three generations.

Unless the city names a road after us.

Or a strip mall.


Unknown said...


And I thought my hometown was bad... you should write a sitcom from yours. Hilarious!

Stace said...

"Now that is funny I don't care who you are."

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