Monday, March 28, 2005

Embarrassing quantities of babble

So much to write about.

Cannot focus to do it.

I don’t know if so many parts of my life have ever moved so fast and so simultaneously. I blink and things change. It’s a lot to keep up with.

I’m a hot mess.

The job. Still unofficial. I could start almost immediately. It is rooted in my internship but is different enough that there is a strong possibility that I’ll actually like it. I won't be working with my current bosses. I will be using my degree. It’s an hour away – far enough away that I’ll have to move out, close enough to be able to charm Dad to come over to fix something on a whim. I have high hopes.

The Colin. Saturday night. The bar. His roommates like me. His house. More drinks. His bedroom. His lips. His hands. He didn’t move too fast. I wasn’t as nervous and as clumsy as I had always feared. The memory has played so many times that it feels imagined. Call yesterday. Lunch today. I try not to get too excited, too attached.

The Dad. He isn’t making it easy. “What? Colin made a booty call?” venomously, when I told him I was going out on Saturday. Constant repetition of the fact that I got home at 5:00 a.m. (and, actually, it was more like 5:30). Making it difficult. I don’t know why.

The coaching. Classes have been dramatically reduced, as they always are in the springtime. Kids are too busy playing soccer to take skating. I’m going to have a lot more free time. I need it.

To sum it all up: holy fucking shit, I cannot believe this is happening to me. Any of this. All of this.

3 comments:

ropedncr said...

how wonderful for you! you deserve all good things.

Sarah said...

It all sounds very exciting! Well done and congratulations :)

Mrs. Architect said...

Oh my gosh, that is all SO exciting!! I am so happy for you!!

 
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