Thursday, January 13, 2005

An entry in which I reveal how strange I truly am

After Meg’s hockey game on Sunday, the family and I went to lunch. The restaurant we chose is Meg’s favorite; we ate there many a time while I was in school and the tradition carried over with Meg’s enrollment at the U.

The meal was uneventful. I ordered the Chicken Artichoke Pizza So Delicious it Makes Me Want to Dance on a Table. It was delicious and it made me want to dance on a table.

Everyone was behaving; everything was great. Until we were leaving.

I unknowingly set myself up for disaster by stopping at the bar and staring at the Indianapolis Colts-Denver Broncos wild card game like I had never seen a television before. My Peyton Manning-induced trance was rudely interrupted by the bartender.

Who went to my high school.

Who squealed my name.

Okay. I’m going to admit something: there is nothing I hate more than polite, what-have-you-done-with-your-life chatter. Especially with kids I went to high school with. Especially people who I used to be friends with. And Rachel, the bartender, and I used to be pretty good friends. In high school.

I acted like a big girl and exchanged pleasantries with Rachel for as long as I could stand it. Never before have 45 seconds seemed so excruciatingly long.

I am proud to admit that I resisted calling Lucy, one of only two friends from high school who I keep in contact with, to narrate the excitement of my encounter. ...until I was out of the restaurant, anyway.

Luuuuuuuuucy! I had a sighting! Neener neener neener.

A sighting?

I’ll explain.

Lucy is my primary partner in crime. Other than my sister, she’s my closest friend. When we’re together, we’re usually doing one of two things:
1. Eating
2. Acting like jackasses

In one of the many moments that we’ve acted like jackasses together, Lucy and I invented the best game ever: Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate!

I can tell you’re confused.

Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate goes something like this: Person A and Person B are doing something completely unrelated to their high school years. At a completely random moment, Person A blurts out the name of a person that they went to high school with. Person B shoots back with another classmate. Person A and Person B exchange the names of classmates into the dark of night. Breaks may be taken to gossip about a Random Class of 2000 Graduate at the discretion of Person A and Person B. Unruly laugher is encouraged.

Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate has spin-off versions, as well.

From our original (and brilliant) concept evolved Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate – Live! In which Person A calls Person B upon spotting a Random Class of 2000 graduate. It is considered appropriate for Person A to be panting with glee while placing the phone call. Description of weight, companion and hair color are highly recommended.

Boring summer jobs have afforded us the luxury of launching Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate – Online! Person A googles an unsuspecting Random Class of 2000 Graduate, laughs at what is found and forwards the links to Person B. Bonus points are awarded for pictures, resumes and court dates.

The pinnacle of Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate is yet to come. In 5 and a half short years, Lucy and I will debut what is bound to be our greatest version of Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate.

Name That Random Class of 2000 Graduate – the 10 Year Class Reunion edition.


Constance said...

Fantastic!*thinking marketing*
I could play with my family. Every sister or brother who went to school with a sister or brother.
Of course I seem to be running into more children of classmates than classmates. Heh Heh. You're thinking that takes all the fun out? Oh you are so wrong!

tom naka said...
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